You meet a guy you gel with and get along royally, and if you’re an optimist, you start to picture a life with him, without any conscious effort on your part. That’s one side effect of the first flush of being in love.
However, there’s no way to know how the relationship will go – a few weeks, or months down the line. But, there are a few massive red flags that wave in front of you in all their glory, that you refuse to take note of because you’re blinded by love. And these signs, if exhibited by your man, then be sure that he will break your heart – sooner rather than later.
Once you’ve been on the block a few times, you’ll know exactly what to look out for, and what to stay far away from. Let’s take a look at some of the signs he’ll exhibit that show he will break your heart.
1. He won’t call you his girlfriend
If you’re with someone, it’s only natural to want to call each other your significant others, right? But if he refuses to introduce you as his girlfriend, or passes you off as a ‘special’ friend, then know that in his mind, you’re not his girlfriend, and nor will you ever be. It’s just that simple, truly.
2. He balks at meeting your friends and family
Your friends and family are the closest people in your life, and it’s only natural to want your man to meet them. But if he flat out refuses to do so, or gives vague to genuine-sounding excuses every time you bring it up, then it’s a sure red flag that he’s not in it for the long haul. That he’s planning his escape before it gets ‘too serious.’
3. He never makes plans
It’s always on you to make plans. And even when you do make plans, elaborate ones too, he won’t deign to make an appearance sometimes. You might probably receive a text later that day saying he just couldn’t make it, not even a breath or whiff of apology anywhere in his tone. Why? Because you’re not a priority to him. You have probably been relegated to somewhere in the middle or too low on his list of priorities.
4. He’s given enough hints that he’s not ready for a relationship
He might have been subtle or not so much, but he has given you enough hints to make you aware of the fact that he’s not ready for a relationship at this point in time, or probably never. You’ve just been deluding yourself otherwise because you’re too blinded by love to see this glaring red flag. However, sometimes, despite your temporary loss of all senses due to love, his words that he’s probably not the best person to be in a relationship with, filters through. And when it does, it’s best you believe him.
5. He’s still in touch with his ex(es)
This could with one of his exes or multiple women. Also, if he’s polite to his exes, then it shows that he’s an inherently good person. But if he’s the kind who doesn’t think twice to hook up with his ex at the drop of a hint, then it’s time you used your head and made the right decision.
6. He’s a fantasist
He’s great at spinning elaborate and sometimes fantastical lies that you’re hard pressed not to believe in. This might be the tactic he uses to fool you into thinking that he’s in it for the long haul. And you being the eternal optimist that you are, you fall for it hook, line, and sinker.
7. He has a very *twisted* relationship with his phone
He’s on the phone all the fricking time, even when he’s in the bathroom. He’s basically addicted to the thing, and he probably can’t see straight if he’s asked to leave it alone for even a couple of hours. You need someone who you can have a conversation with, not talk at the back of someone’s phone! This is a red flag you need to be aware of – and stat.
8. He’s hard to talk to
Whether it’s talking to him about your work, or bringing up something that’s bothering you about your relationship, you just don’t seem comfortable talking to him. It could be because he seems too blasé about everything, or he seems disconnected and/or disinterested about the issues you want to tackle, or, he could be dismissive. If he shows any of these traits, then he’s definitely going to break you heart – in the near future.
9. He trivializes your concerns
You think there’s something wrong, and when you broach the subject with him, he dismisses your concern, making you feel as if you’re overthinking things, or worse, that you’re hysterical, on the verge of showing crazy behavior. No man is worth sticking around with if he makes you think and feel as if your concerns are without basis. Even if they are, he needs to sit you down and explain why they are so, not dismiss it as being the rantings of a hysterical woman.
10. He’s dating someone else
While you thought you were exclusive with each other, he’s gone ahead and started dating someone else. And he didn’t even have the courtesy to let you know that he wants to date multiple people at the same time. That’s like the basic rules of dating. Run, woman, because he will break your heart eventually.
There you go. If your man exhibits most or all of the signs mentioned above, then it’s time for you to remove your blinders and see the writing on the wall. However much you want to believe in the fact that “your love” will change him, don’t hold out hope. It rarely ever happens that way, if at all. You’re better off being alone than with someone who clearly isn’t ready for a relationship